25 Days of Christmas

I think this is a great idea, this Christmas challenge from A Peek Inside The Fishbowl. There are so many things to do at Christmas and it's so easy to lose track of the things most important to you and your family over the holidays.

My 25 Days of Christmas isn't really 25 days at all, more just a list of things I want to do in December that will contribute to the overall cheer of the holidays because they are a) fun for the whole family or b) give us a chance to slow down and appreciate the season. Because I work, some of them can be done simultaneously (such as drink wine, write cards, and listen to Messiah) or can be fitted in to our regular routine (reading books, watching a movie)

So what's on my list?

• Drink wine and make plans
• Read A Christmas Carol (every year, without fail)
• Read Christmas stories by the fire before bedtime
• Have a Christmas Movie Night with the kids
• Christmas Cookie Baking (gingerbread men)
• Listen to Messiah
• Write and address Christmas cards
• Letters to Santa
• Write a Christmas Story with the kids (this year: a pioneer version)
• Plan a Christmas Day concert (I supervise, the kids plan)
• Christmas Tree farm and sleigh ride
• Tree Decorating fondue and snack night
• Old Fashioned Carol Sing
• Christmas Parade
• Visit Alight at Night at Upper Canada Village
• Take the kids shopping for Dad (yes, this is fun. The trick is knowing what to buy ahead of time, feeding them before we go, not combining it with any other shopping, and going for hot chocolate afterwards) 
• Pot Luck Christmas get-together with friends
• Decking of the Halls (medieval tradition) followed by a solstice feast
• Moonlit snowshoe or walk across the fields. Christmas hats optional.
• Annual hair cut. (Kidding, but not by much)

Christmas In The Country part I

Snow is falling faster now

And dusting on a hill.

Skaters on the river,

Gentle dancers in the chill.

The children's laughter ringing,

As they overturn their sleighs,

Waiting for a country Christmas day.

- Roger Whittaker, Christmas In The Country

We all have our own Christmas traditions. For me, there is no rush to start the Christmas season. November will see me make tentative plans and do a bit of online shopping, but that's all. Then December 1 arrives, and with it my annual  yule ritual of a glass of white wine and a calendar as I plot out what we will be doing and when.

And so this weekend, the first full weekend in December, we kick off our own Christmas In the Country with the local Christmas Tree lighting ceremony. This small town, hot chocolate drinking, christmas caroling event happens tonight, and is the perfect beginning to a weekend that will include decorating the house (but no tree yet), a Christmas parade, and baking cookies.

Twilight Fans - Skip This Post.

I read Twilight the other day. And New Moon.

Sigh.

I had tried Twilight once before, but unable to get past the first two chapters, had tossed it into a drawer where it stayed for a year, until I read a great review that compared Twilight to the classic Pamela/Shamela novels of the 18th century.

Having read both Richardson's Pamela and Fielding's Shamela, I was now awake and engaged, and I fished Twilight out of the drawer and read it. All the way through.

Sigh.

Neither the writing nor the plot improved much on re-acquaintance. I found myself rolling my eyes and gritting my teeth, in part at the book and in part at the incredible media frenzy that surrounds the latest movie. Having once lined up with friends (in the early 80's) and watched in amazement as they shrieked and swooned for a Michael Jackson look-a-like (hello??), and having witnessed the deluge of floral tributes that poured over a long-forgotten Halifax grave that just happened to belong to a mariner named Jack Dawson when the movie Titanic was at its height, it doesn't surprise me that teenage girls are obsessed with this series. That their mothers are too I find a bit odd, but each to their own. But the whole on-line debate about whether vampires or werewolves are sexier struck me as a bit ridiculous (though if pressed I'd have voted for werewolves - at least until I met Jacob, who I am sorry to say, impressed me even less than Edward.)

As for Edward, well, vampires aren't my idea of a romantic lead (icy lips, skin cold as marble...no thanks), but I say that with a codicil because I can see why he would appeal to a certain teenage set with his charisma, his sophistication, his passion for Bella, and yes (in complete agreement with the linked review) with his immense wealth. Indeed with the exception of that cold flesh (and maybe that's just me), Edward is the quintessential romantic hero, found in any number of YA/Adult/Romance genre novels.

But Bella... I couldn't warm to Bella. She was a bit dull but kind of sweet in a shy way at first. Endearing even. Her infatuation with Edward quickly took her in a different direction, and by the time I got to New Moon and she pined herself into a post-Edward depression, not eating, not sleeping, not seeing friends for months, I lost patience. I give even the sappiest teenage girl more credit than that, and I'd personally have liked to see a heroine with a bit more resilience, a bit more spark.

Having mentioned most of the things I didn't like, and without going into the complete laughability of the convoluted plot reviews of books 3 & 4 that have convinved me to stop reading at book 2, I must just say this: that Stephanie Myer draws out the sexual tension between Edward and Bella very well and has captured the raw emotion of first love. That's what makes you read on, that's what holds the reader. I think it's also largely why New Moon fails - sustaining that kind of tension just isn't possible, and Myer, for all her plot twists and turns, loses touch with the one thing she does really well.

Soundless Golden Bells Alone In The Storm

Detail

by Al Purdy

The ruined stone house

has an elderly apple tree

left there by the farmer

whatever else he took with him

It bears fruit every year

gone wild and wormy

with small bitter apples

nobody eats

even children know better

I passed that way on the road

to Trenton twice a month

all winter long

noticing how the apples clung

in spite of hurricane winds

sometimes with caps of snow

little golden bells

And perhaps none of the other

travelers looked that way

but I make no parable of them

they were there and that’s all

for some reason I must remember

and think of the leafless tree

and its fermented fruit

one week in late January

when wind blew down the sun

and earth shook like a cold room

no one could live in

with zero weather

soundless golden bells

alone in the storm

All For One and One For All

Let's just say that we like Musketeers around our house. It started years ago when Erik was 4 and we rented the Mickey Mouse version (which was better than I expected and makes great use of well known pieces of classical music). The Musketeer's Battle Cry All For One and One For All became our mantra, and to this day we say it as the school bus rolls into view, the kids and I holding out our imaginary swords and no doubt giving the neighbours a giggle into the bargain.

It's one of our favourite movies and favourite books, and tonight the kids are graduating to The Man In The Iron Mask which features the musketeers, older and wiser but still ready for action.

It got me thinking about the Musketeers, and how distinct each of them are. Erik's favourite is Athos, of course. The leader. The intelligent one. The aristocrat. The one who looks most like young Obi Wan Kenobi. Anna likes Aramis - poet, dreamer, idealist. Grace likes Porthos because he's always laughing (her words). And of course all three like D'Artagnan: Erik because he's heroic, the girls because (in the 1993 movie at least) he's young and cute.

It made me wonder if perhaps knowing which of the Musketeers you like best gives some insight into your personality, kind of like one of those Facebook quizes that claims to  understand you based on what colour you like, or what car you drive (Red, and a mini van, if you want to know).

Which of the Musketeers do I like best? Is it fun-loving, life-embracing Porthos?Perhaps the intelligent but brooding and melancholic Athos? Maybe Aramis with his poetic character, inner strength and private nature? Or is it brave and impetuous young D'Artagnan?

I'll leave you guessing while I try to figure it out. Meanwhile, which musketeer do you prefer? And Why?

The Homework Debate

Lots of people arguing right now over whether homework is good or bad for kids, whether it’s useful or just a waste of time that gets in the way of other fun activities.


Here’s what I think:

1. Homework can be tough on families, especially these days when both parents work and the kids go to after-school programs. When the family gets home at 6pm and has to fit in homework between supper and running out to Cubs, the kitchen can quickly become a battlefield where nobody wins.

2. Some of the homework kids get is, let’s face it, silly. I completely identify with the lawyer parents who started this debate when, after questioning the value of the crossword puzzle homework and being told it was for fun, they sent in a note to the teacher that said, thanks, but we’ll make our own fun.

3. Days are short for much of the school year, and kids aren’t getting outside enough. Having hours of homework doesn’t help that.

Having said all that, I agree with homework. I believe it is valuable and an important part of school life, and here’s why:

1. Homework is the bridge between school and home. It allows me (as a parent) to get involved in what my kids are learning, to reinforce lessons learned in class, to see how they are handling new material, and what their strengths and weaknesses are. (Without homework, for example, I would never have known that my 9 year old, in a composition, described the older cat as being pissed off, and would not have had the opportunity to brainstorm more suitable descriptors and remind him that not everything Daddy says should be repeated.)

2. Teachers do a great job, but sometimes kids who are having difficulty in a specific subject benefit from a little one-on-one time with Mom where we can go over trouble areas and figure out how to solve problems in a way that makes sense for that child. And when Grade 4 Math seems just a little elusive, we can send them to Dad. (And what’s with Grade 4 Math anyway – the answers are easy, but the way they want to solve them are so convoluted and unclearly worded that it drives me crazy).

3. Doing homework regularly at a younger age makes the transition into high school much easier, and establishes solid study/work habits that will help them later in life.

Homework should never be about new work. It should not take up too much of a child’s time (I think the 10 minute per grade rule is good). I like the younger grade (K-3) approach our school uses where they send homework for the week, and allow parents to figure out when and where it gets done, allowing us to schedule around Cubs, Karate, and days when we just want to go outside and play.

For the most part though, at least at our house, homework is a priority. I know it, the kids know it, and their teachers know it. Sure, we’ve had days when I’ve written a note to my son’s teacher saying I told him to leave his homework, and I don’t apologize if I decide to bury the kids in fallen leaves one glorious afternoon instead of making them sit at a table practicing spelling. And some nights there just isn’t time for one reason or another.

But I get tired of the debate that it has to be all or nothing. Like so much in life, it’s all about finding a balance that works so that work and fun happen side by side.

Weekend Highlights

On Friday night, after Christmas shopping for the myriad of nieces and nephews I would see Saturday, I took my three into Chapters where we bought books (of course) and waited for Andrew who had driven deeper into Montreal to pick up a motor. The absolute highlight of my weekend (with a few exceptions that I'll get to in a minute) was sitting in the Chapters Starbucks overlooking the hum and bustle of the bookstore, drinking the Mezzo Latte that I bought (along with some overpriced but apparently delicious Orange juice for the kids), the four of us reading at a small table in companionable silence.

Heaven! Bliss! Peace and quiet and books.

The weekend went rapidly downhill after that - though I'm calling it an adventure, rather than a disaster in order to make it seem more fun than it was.

But we did finally get to Toronto. We did finally get to see the rest of the family, albeit briefly.

Which brings me to those other highlights of the weekend I was talking about:

Isabella - all baby smiles and roly poly dimples

Rhys - 2 years old with all the attitude and adorable grins that go with it

Naomi - all grown up at almost 6

Michael - another 2 year old who warmed up to me enough to let me read him books. I taught him to growl like a polar bear

Emma - lovely 10 year old with a quiet nature

Ethan - well, all newborns are perfect

And of course, my own three kids, who despite a long and trying weekend, were amazing. I had better say that now because in 20 minutes I'm going to have to rouse them out of bed for school, and odds on that after their long and trying weekend, they're just a little cranky.